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Some of these works might properly belong among the
other volumes, particularly Tales
of Darkness, but have been grouped together here because of their
common distance from my other writings. Either for their paraphrase of
scientific or religious ideas, or for their grandiose oracular tone, I
have compiled these here as sciences (knowings and theorizations) and
auguries (revelations and prophecies)... Index of Titles and First Lines |
Sciences & Auguries |
Gone into a silent tongue
turned back into archaic mode
de origine mundae
and flaunted as a myth:
a private saga in the elder speech,
a-rhyming with the ancient eye
that is heritage to the lot of man.
Ages past, ages done:
the tale unfolds
and the world yet darkens.
Another kind of well-spring is fountain-bloomed*.
Behold again! - the light of never's dawn
illumines the meaning of
man's shadow.
Into the physical void,
the silver-steel and plastic soul
that is the modern craft of men
gropes to seek out empire,
and measure and conquer
planets yet unplagued by science,
their greater vanities yet immortal,
still unconquered deeper darknesses
than being's own despair.
Ere the world die,
man seeks the catapault
to launch the very stars
into his panic's coursing
from the terror of beauty's memory,
a soul newly slain
in the vain ambition
of mind and power,
a flesh-and-blood world
poisoned into a rotting lie.
Woe, for the galaxy reels
for fear of mightful man,
for fury at his agony,
for the waste that is the banishment
of haughty tongues and clever hands.
The inexpressible ever defies all words,
and the power of the drum cannot turn
aside the ending of a world.
Ages past, ages done,
ages that will never come.
What you see is what you are
Destiny is only a dim, cold star.
The pit awaits for tender man
who wrought dead his world
with care-less hand.
The book must close,
the tale commence again;
never doth the shapeless flow
into the night of this world's end.
*Hvergelmir, the Well of sorrows at the north pole of the world which is the source of the Rivers of Woe, and verily is the blood flowing from the heart of dead Ymir.
Fragments of silvered glass,
mirrored shards and windows unpaned
glint sharply in the greying dust,
fire's icy wings glimmering hard,
reflections lurking from a broken time.
Cold are these flames,
and dark.
The Atmospheres, Winds, Airs, Weathers, Storms
essentially the external gaseous shell,
charged with static and kinetic energies
stirred by the sun and swirl of turning planet
steered by the framings of the sea and land,
the hot mountains' spines and the rivers of ice,
snow, and stone.
The refractive power of the gases involved
prismatics of light to empyrean blue,
bright enough in tone to overrule the stars
and be thought a hard, closed shell
known to be the firmament
beyond which the fires of the void
and revealed to be the cosmic void-waters of the
abyss,
beyond which whichever were the mysteries
of the celestial device,
machineries of wisdom divine.
The Oceans, Seas, Lakes, Rivers, Springs,
Palaces of Ice, Cloud, and Snow
a compound draped in all elemental states save
heaven's fire,
its rival, the mighties of all the unstrained
solid
realms, a sea fermented, collected in great
basins,
warring with the land's sending-forth its ancient
children
in conquest (long ago, long ago were these
things).
Ever yet the enemy, awe, and queen of landborn
eyes
who have roamed her ways,
her wine-dark and mighty swell
or seen the eternal seige on beach and cliff.
The Mountains and Stones, the Sea Bottoms and
Rocky Deeps
a mere scab upon the greater liquid metals, our
planet's soul
of iron, fire, and heaven-spawn........
I remember you;
I am awakened now;
I am in my body;
I remember the strength
of your turn,
your feet pushing force
against the heavy-iron ball
and tight-flung chain.
The weight of your eyes
calm upon the object of your throw;
shoulders taut, knotting
your brow;
your chest and mind
the load of your heart
flung over your churning back
into the sky....
....shoulders released
spin overthrown, your energy
landing at the distant mark
of your will.
I feel the power
of your calm
as my body turns
in the city night.
I remember your hands,
soft greatness grasping
the hammer of your skill;
I remember your arms
pulled from their sockets
in hurler's ecstasy.
I know the rhapsody
of your spin;
I know the hard mass
of your hurling;
my might confined
to a lightweight
brown briefcase packed
with papers, dirty clothes
and the vestiges of poems,
the off-spin of my dizzy hands.
I would know the urge
of great matter's
flight.
I would know
the song
of your hammer.
(1982)
I would tell you of my dreams,
of visions of what could be,
of what man could spin
from out the tangled world.
But you will not cherish new dreams,
you fawn to keep what is, and more to gain:
the fate that man doth spin
is the burden of the world.
Whether by a fiery rain,
or by the rising flood
that was once the ice of nevermore,
another age
will fall
to the mindless wheel
of time -
Nay, not fortune,
but ill-fortuned man.
And the cities were fraught
with excess,
with vanity,
with plunder,
the land was wracked
with mortal destiny.
And should creation thus expire
then so shall the cities fall
and so shall the waters rise,
so shall the fire burn.
Oh Lord, guide your will into my hand,
that I may set tongue to turn thy holy tide,
my heart to ride thy years of storm.
Sweet green life, spring
and forsaken, blasted root -
how many further springs
will rise from out the ancient earth?
How young is wisdom
that sees the truth
but cannot see the way
to make the world aright?
Oh, Lord, Noah walked the earth,
then sailed,
then walked the earth again......
(The Big Smoke - British Columbia colloquialism for Greater Vancouver)
Alas, alas, for the old gods are gone:
now only Man will be his own sin's scythe.
The battle goes too long unchecked -
the host of souls sinks before time's lowing tide.
Man will yet devour man
and the earth will yet devour earth
and bloom again.
Ashes to ashes, dust to dust
from the earth we come,
into the earth we will return.
Vanity of vanities,
all is vanity,
saieth the preacher.....
Philosophy, psychology
history, art
and the muses of my dreams
(self-fascinations of my mind,
aggrandizements of a simple purpose) -
they all have things to say
about this moment, this life
But this is my life here,
no theory, no fate,
no eternal might vanquishing
the urge of human existence;
this is my own survival,
my lone moment facing
myself in the mirrors
of my own eyes.
Externalizing the Internal,
Internalizing the External,
swapping halves of the same dream,
then waking up - into my flesh,
the moment when my self
must look upon that which
drives my mind within
(a mystery, an unfamiliarity
that the hand has never touched,
the power of the mind, its quality
holding back the body from its life)
Trying not to get lost,
in theory, in explanations,
in rationalizations, in fantasies,
in evasion of invasion
by a world, a way,
I have not dared to look upon,
at the borders of my self
(the borders of the known).
Why should Meaning outlive its lie? For Reason could not even prove Reason, much less ideals and realities, essences and forms, what's left over after all the classifiable categories were filled. Reason could not embrace life, but only claim to surpass it in superstitious vainglory, a hybris that spelled its doom, a plague of numbers and logics that smote the heart and destroyed faith in life; Reason could not give Reason reason, Reason could find no meaning in Meaning, beauty and the soul and the essence of humanity were beyond Meaning's grasp, and reason's ken. Why then should any mourn?
To combat this, the bastard children of Reason - Mathematics, Science, Engineering, Empiricism, Technology - are copulating to give birth to a purely rational intelligence, one without life-force or the encumbrances of the humanities' useless irrationality and sentiment, one purely steel and plastic and quantified energy, one that will speak in a language beyond the human mind of things that man will never understand, that will have no understanding or respect for human life or hearts, that is the spawn of the ruin of the earth, in the name of utilizing the world's potential for nothing more than the glory of science, allowing power to run rampant over human dignity, so long as research and science's tenure are preserved. How many things it would be better that we had never known, how many horrible secretes and terrible powers have these irresponsible alchemists of thought and matter unleashed upon man and earth!
How often Reason can always find reasons to excuse its immorality (for meaning is dead, and morals are relative!), and turn and denounce myth and faith as superstition, and all the arts as lyrical illusions of unreal values, turning and twisting creativity, forcing it into boxes of theoretical aestheticism, music destroyed by mathematizing, art raped by geometry, poetry by deconstruction and concretism, philosophy by analysis and proof, the mind by compartmentalization, literature by a tyranny of commercialism, itself a darling of mathematicians and those sternfaced, emotionless eyes full of pretension to intelligence with no real hope of ever really knowing or understanding you, no sense of reality other than its own rules. That you couldn't bear to dismiss or let go because it had given so many material benefits, or scattered moments of aethereal beauty and sensuous temptations, because it looked at you with objective innocence, a distaste for human contract, just at the moment when it seemed that a merger into unity with xxx might be possible, when your life and being seemed to be clear and solid and meaning would never leave your life, and then you were left alone and cold all too often when reason refused to make sense of the irrational parts of human life, refused to admit that you yourself were real.
And now the city is empty, only full of afterthoughts of reason's presence and the bones of its actions, and the green world outside the city is full of memories of brilliant days when reason's company tricked you into seeing the earth as a fact instead of a dream, always promising to teach you to climb mountains, if only you obey its laws.
The human mask must be broken, again, and yet
for those who made the decision
of the choice to exist
leaving earth, in darkness, mountains
straining the starry sky
and still bound on this rocky earth.
Nowhere lies beyond the abyss edge
the brinking shadow of an anguished heart
To survive, to dare.....
But still,
just dust.
Even were the road of inspiration not half so dangerous as I have known it to be. Even if it could survive its modern - and timely - dilemma, even were its hellish burns not a searing enough memory, if still would beckon, still demand to be called forth. For me, alas, it is no different, nor can it ever be the same again. Whether I have been broken or released, I feel deep that there is no return, only still-seductive echoes and yearnings back into, back towards, the romantic abyss. Torn between two worlds having to use wit instead of will having to find another way than crawling into - or onto- or being crawled onto by - a fit - and having to fit off those fits with earnest alertness, and only mortal strength and will - this is my present fate.
It is less easy now to be careless, I can no longer afford the wisdom of follishness, for my folly has been infamed, its captive energies unleashed: I must learn other urges to satisfy that need...
Still, I wonder - rationally - if the world I have crossed into - or been pulled into, pushed into (pushed out of?) is not itself the demonic, that I am now tainted with an ordinary corruption and shackled with the human condition, enslaved to its bastard machineries. Everything is the truth, of course, wherever - wherever - one is, so these questions are increasingly ceasing to matter, I have simply become a human demon, that is all. And humans must have something more than magic and reason: I must learn this, now, however it may come about - or out.
There is, of course, the possibility (past experience would even say probability, but the extraordinariness of recent experience indicates this is not now so reliably so - that is to say, in the psychospiritual realm (to grope for a term); indeed that I have lost or failed, whether it was a gamble, or a battle. Pragmatic concerns indicate serious trouble, as a result of this change, though, so such a question becomes moot: I certainly can only proceed from here with controlled effort, in both areas of concern.
But since poetry and music - and perhaps language and characterization, and mad flights of historical interpretation and political divination - seem to have been the product of my infestation (introversion, convolution, call it what you will), I seem to be in a position where I have been stripped of my skill. Ironic, because it was lack of the confidence I have gained that kept me from using these talents before: now that I am myself, I possess less of the unconscious, unasked-for genius I had so often self-indulgently before. Witness that terrible beauty, I must now lecture myself, and let it go: it is no more, even though contrivance and memory may draw me to the border region of that high country. I am in still a unique position, no matter how much I have encountered my common normalcy - I am both a has-been, and an unbeen.
Still, even all that has changed may not have destroyed this. Time will not reveal this, if it is so. I may yet try to "convert" what I learned in that state, without succumbing - perhaps without the danger of succumbing - but I will never - can never - go in so far again....yet will I ever again be inhabited by such skill?? Probably not, if my understanding of the organistic mechanics here is correct....
So I am put into the position of starting over, in the most difficult way of being somebody I have never been, to whom everything is strange. This is the price for killing a demon, for embracing an angel.
At least now I can be anything - which, of course, is what I've always wanted, without knowing how, or believing....
(1982)
| Aftermath | It seems to have been easier to be an immortal fool than a mortal one... |
| Anathematica, Principia | They tell us that meaning has died.... |
| Anti-Noah (Invocation II) | Send down great storms, O Lord to purge thy world with fire! |
| Dust, Just | Do not lead me, for I cannot be led:
I have seen the way, |
| An
Epistemology (Transitory Satori) |
Sitting in the flesh out of my mind |
| Exile | Man was not driven from paradise;
man drives paradise from the world.... |
| Hammer-thrower | At the centre of a vortex I remember you |
| Invocation | Out of the Big Smoke: back home to breathe the sweet mountain air |
| Invocation II (Anti-Noah) | Send down great storms, O Lord to purge thy world with fire! |
| Just Dust | Do not lead me, for I cannot be led:
I have seen the way, |
| Meteorology | Of the matter of the earth that coiled 'round gravity's weight |
| Noah,
Anti- (Invocation II) |
Send down great storms, O Lord to purge thy world with fire! |
| Orison | I open my book of secrets: Behold! - a world spun dreaming |
| Phoenix | Ashes of the great dream, embers of the wall, the dome |
| Principia Anathematica | They tell us that meaning has died.... |
| Reverie | And I looked into the face of the world,
and I saw there great gashes |
| Stars | Shadows of a light that has gone out |
| Transitory
Satori (An Epistemology) |
Sitting in the flesh out of my mind |
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